My lover kissed me good bye as he left for work. He always kisses me after her sprays his favorite cologne of the season. This season, he can’t get enough of the Weekend by Burberry I gave him for our anniversary. No, we aren’t married and I wish people would stop rushing my time. I rushed my last relationship and what it got me was a broken heart and side eye. Five years of dealing with bullshit to get a broken heart and side eye is simply not the business. My ex is the reason I wake up early and sip on this coffee like it will save my life. The situation is simply this, I love him and I love the way he sexed me. He wasn’t good for me, but damn it, he made me feel good sexually. How do I tell the man I’m with I’m not satisfied? How do I continue to make love to him while fantasizing about my last lover? The situation just isn’t right.
I mean, how do you move on when someone was the best you ever had sexually and your heart is with the one you love… but the lover can’t satisfy my sexual needs ordinarily. I mean we’ve enrolled in Kama Sutra classes, taken yoga, do his and her version of kegal exercises four times a day, watch pornography to get a clue that maybe I’m not doing enough, but my love just isn’t hitting it on the regular like I need. Obviously, I’m doing everything he needs perfectly because there aren’t any complaints on his end. I love him, I really do, but how do I tell him his sex just isn’t doing it for me? I figured I had a problem, like I was stuck on my stupid ex after all of these years of trying to sweep it under the rug. Well, I finally thought I would talk to someone about it. I slide into my shoes and head towards the door. The minute I turn the knob to walk out and just like magic guess who is staring at me in mid-knock… my old lover.
“What the hell are you doing here Brian?” I almost yell out of horror until my panties start to moistening. “Nicki, I had to see you. I need to talk to you about something.” I gave him THE stupidest side eye I could muster with a healthy side of nucca please! “It’s been three years, sir. You left me, no warning, no notes just rolled the hell out. I moved on and forgot all about you!” He looked at me wounded but determined to talk. I folded my arms and gave him the “what the hell you have to say now” look as he stammered on. He explained why he left, that he wanted to find out what life was like beyond our relationship and how he just needed time to see how much I really meant to him, blah, blah, blah. The icing on the cake was that he just wants me to consider having sex with him one last time to get it out of his system…
Now the pure sexual need in me says hell yes, but I can’t fight the feeling that I just need him to vanish just as quickly as he appeared at my door. I told him I would think about it and shut the door on his face. He asked how will I contact him. “Come back tomorrow same time. Now go.” He says he’ll be back later tonight like my permission just isn’t needed. I hear him walk down the stairs and I slide down the door to the floor. What the hell have I done? Not only have I failed trying to be a hard ass, but I told him to come back because I am literally going to bang his brains out. Damn, you, Brian!! How will I ever concentrate on the rest of my day?
Long story short, I couldn’t function at all during the day. I was way too giddy and anxious to blow my back out on Brian’s joystick. He walked into my place looking around taking note of how long he’s been missing in my life. He waited a while just catching up on our lives and how good the good times were. He made note of how he’s never found anyone to love him like I did or anyone to sex him like we did. That’s all I needed to hear. If we didn’t have anything in common anymore, sex was that thread. He apologized for everything, all of the shit I blamed myself for he apologized and held me real tight. I didn’t realize the tears were streaming down my face and his lips found that one familiar spot that always conceded to his will. Before I could count to one I was naked and straddled on the floor.
He kissed and licked me from head to toe and back. I was a quivering mess when he finally decided to undress next to me. All I could think about was what new things has he learned from other lovers… what positions was he planning to put me in and how long would it take me to come off of his efforts. Needless to say his tongue got the first three.
Spread eagle on the sofa he put on a condom and slid in slower than a drop of molasses from the bottle. Trying to grind into him to speed up the process of going in deeper, he just backed up going slower. Because I’m defiant to the end, he used techniques like these to make sure he had control. At this point, I didn’t care. It was all animalistic and need driven. He finally plunged in and stroked me like it was the reason I needed to breathe. He pumped with a force that made my back arch and moans cooed the pleasures he gave me. There was nothing and no one in the world that could bring my body into submission like Brian and he always knew exactly how to make the soft pink matter work in his favor.
Before I could make out my fourth orgasm I was on my side in a perfect L being served all the strokes of bliss ever in life. He hit all the corners only he knew existed because no one else has ever dared to reach in those places. Gasping for air and clenching the sofa for dear life, he smacked my ass and moaned my name because all I could do was clench down on him harder. The more I clenched the faster and deeper he plunged into the most sensitive spots of my body. He pinched a nipple with one hand while swirling my clit with the other. Sending me to my fifth orgasm I find myself shaking and quivering on the sofa looking up at this man in awe. He lifts me like a rag doll and I’m forced to straddle him as he slides in… deeper… slower, then faster, I can’t think. I can’t breathe. I am just there. Being sexed in the best and most visceral way I can imagine. He finds a wall and my back arches due to the temperature as he drills deeper into my sixth. Crying out his name he gasps out my name and grips me closer to his chest as I try to support myself but my legs just won’t let me be great. He looks deep into my eyes and says he could never have me out of his system because of what we just shared and always shared in the bedroom. Too bad for the both of us, we will never be able to get our sex out of our systems…
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