....On Turning a Heaux into a Housewife
"I got Heauxs. I got Heauuxxxss. In different Area Codes [Area]. Area Codes [Codes]." - Luda and Nate Dogg
As I slept on the shore of the Persian Gulf in Dubai, I fell asleep watching the waves crash against the shore. While asleep, I had an amazing dream, about an Emirate woman twerking to my favorite 2 Chainz song [I Luv Dem Strippers]. Man, this dream was amazing! She was in my hotel room, twerking for all my Durhams [money], and I was just enjoying the show. However, the dream progressed, and guess who managed to fall in love with the twerker.....me. I mean, this is my dream and all. Anyway, I woke up, with a sense of disbelief, simply because the thought of me falling in love with a stripper was something that I'd dealt with before. *S/O to Patrice and Sweet Lea Lea* It's so taboo to fall in love with a stripper, right? She's a heaux, and you can't save them heauxs, right? What would your people say? What would your church members say? Shidd, my Pastor would be cool with it, as long as she helped pay my bills. However, it shouldn't matter what anyone else thinks. Do you. YOLO. Blah blah blah!
"You can have an ole lady, but dem heauxs, they for everybody!" - Juvenile
I guess what I'm trying to say is....I'm a Misfit, and I honestly believe that one can turn a heaux into a housewife. Yep, I said it, and I really do mean it. I think it's really a perception thing in the end. Some people say cucumbers taste better pickled. Is that relevant to this argument No, but if heauxs were pickles, and housewives were cucumbers, you'd still eat them, right? Wait, so we can eat heauxs and housewives now? I mean, I was eating them before, but not salad. I ain't eating salad. You can keep that sh*t to yourself, ole nasty ass. Timeout, this is way off topic, and it's cold out here by the water. Let me regain my focus. Heauxs can definitely be converted into housewives. It'll take some patience and perseverance but it is doable. You can judge me all you like, but by the end of this adventurous rant, I think you'll understand where I'm coming from.
"You can't turn a heaux into a housewife." - Ancient Chinese Proverb (?)
Okay, now I think we'll all agree that being called a heaux, or associating ourselves with heauxs is not something we all strive for. The filthy stigma surrounding the label haunts both men and women, so we strive hard not earn the title. Heauxs are viewed as nasty, trifling, shallow, desperate individuals searching for validation of some sort. Taking it a step further, in popular society, heauxs are viewed as community property, and although we all want general acceptance, we probably don't want to be "shared" amongst the people. Heauxs are often disrespected, treated like dirt, and used for entertainment. Longer story short, nobody wants to be a heaux....but there are some people that wouldn't mind being with a heaux.
" I wouldn't care if you were a Prostitute and that you hit every man that you ever knew" - Lil Wayne
I'm honestly cuff a heaux**. Hell, it's not like most of the non-heauxs out here are "pure" anyway. Each one of us has done something that we will ultimately regret, and for some of us, it's [carelessly] sleeping with numerous people. However, I think someone willing to change their heauxish ways deserves a chance at being considered for more serious and meaningful relationships. Now, I'm not saying that any of my past dating partners was a heaux, but I'm also not saying that none of them weren't. See what I did there?
**Don't get it twisted, I'm not going to let her just keeping fuc*ing and sucking everyone she meets. If she's going to be with me, then she's going to have to adjust her outlook on things. Remember, this is about turning heauxs into housewives.
Look, in my opinion, many of us would be considered heauxs before being deemed housewife / househusband material. I think every heaux, both male and female, is just looking for acceptance and security. I could be completely wrong, but the confessions of a stripper in Waffle House booth mean something to me. Now, I'm not saying that it'll be easy like she probably is. I just think that in the end, it'll be worth it. That heaux will hold you down. Just give it a chance. Let's be real here.....within every housewife / househusband, you'll definitely find a hoe.....get it?
"I got Heauxs. I got Heauuxxxss. In different Area Codes [Area]. Area Codes [Codes]." - Luda and Nate Dogg
As I slept on the shore of the Persian Gulf in Dubai, I fell asleep watching the waves crash against the shore. While asleep, I had an amazing dream, about an Emirate woman twerking to my favorite 2 Chainz song [I Luv Dem Strippers]. Man, this dream was amazing! She was in my hotel room, twerking for all my Durhams [money], and I was just enjoying the show. However, the dream progressed, and guess who managed to fall in love with the twerker.....me. I mean, this is my dream and all. Anyway, I woke up, with a sense of disbelief, simply because the thought of me falling in love with a stripper was something that I'd dealt with before. *S/O to Patrice and Sweet Lea Lea* It's so taboo to fall in love with a stripper, right? She's a heaux, and you can't save them heauxs, right? What would your people say? What would your church members say? Shidd, my Pastor would be cool with it, as long as she helped pay my bills. However, it shouldn't matter what anyone else thinks. Do you. YOLO. Blah blah blah!
"You can have an ole lady, but dem heauxs, they for everybody!" - Juvenile
I guess what I'm trying to say is....I'm a Misfit, and I honestly believe that one can turn a heaux into a housewife. Yep, I said it, and I really do mean it. I think it's really a perception thing in the end. Some people say cucumbers taste better pickled. Is that relevant to this argument No, but if heauxs were pickles, and housewives were cucumbers, you'd still eat them, right? Wait, so we can eat heauxs and housewives now? I mean, I was eating them before, but not salad. I ain't eating salad. You can keep that sh*t to yourself, ole nasty ass. Timeout, this is way off topic, and it's cold out here by the water. Let me regain my focus. Heauxs can definitely be converted into housewives. It'll take some patience and perseverance but it is doable. You can judge me all you like, but by the end of this adventurous rant, I think you'll understand where I'm coming from.
"You can't turn a heaux into a housewife." - Ancient Chinese Proverb (?)
Okay, now I think we'll all agree that being called a heaux, or associating ourselves with heauxs is not something we all strive for. The filthy stigma surrounding the label haunts both men and women, so we strive hard not earn the title. Heauxs are viewed as nasty, trifling, shallow, desperate individuals searching for validation of some sort. Taking it a step further, in popular society, heauxs are viewed as community property, and although we all want general acceptance, we probably don't want to be "shared" amongst the people. Heauxs are often disrespected, treated like dirt, and used for entertainment. Longer story short, nobody wants to be a heaux....but there are some people that wouldn't mind being with a heaux.
" I wouldn't care if you were a Prostitute and that you hit every man that you ever knew" - Lil Wayne
I'm honestly cuff a heaux**. Hell, it's not like most of the non-heauxs out here are "pure" anyway. Each one of us has done something that we will ultimately regret, and for some of us, it's [carelessly] sleeping with numerous people. However, I think someone willing to change their heauxish ways deserves a chance at being considered for more serious and meaningful relationships. Now, I'm not saying that any of my past dating partners was a heaux, but I'm also not saying that none of them weren't. See what I did there?
**Don't get it twisted, I'm not going to let her just keeping fuc*ing and sucking everyone she meets. If she's going to be with me, then she's going to have to adjust her outlook on things. Remember, this is about turning heauxs into housewives.
Look, in my opinion, many of us would be considered heauxs before being deemed housewife / househusband material. I think every heaux, both male and female, is just looking for acceptance and security. I could be completely wrong, but the confessions of a stripper in Waffle House booth mean something to me. Now, I'm not saying that it'll be easy like she probably is. I just think that in the end, it'll be worth it. That heaux will hold you down. Just give it a chance. Let's be real here.....within every housewife / househusband, you'll definitely find a hoe.....get it?
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