The Quickie Chronicles - Garden Omelet

I'm all for admiration and flirting, but this is getting down right creepy. I think the only reason I haven't reported her crazy, cross-eyed ass, is because she leaves me really nice tips, and because her low-cut shirts never disappoint....and because her ass is fat. My name tag reads "Duke," but my real name is David. I'm a Server at the IHOP near campus, and have been so for two miserable years. I typically see the same few patrons during a given month, but Domonique comes in here EVERY Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday. The food isn't that fucking delicious, and the water tastes like nickels, so there must be something else about this place that she enjoys.

No matter what, the hostess working when Domonique arrives always sits her at a table in my area, like it's a joke or something. It's gotten to the point where I don't even bring a menu to the table, because I already know what Domonique will say: "Hey, Duke. You already know what I want. A Garden Omelet with pancakes, and a glass of water, no ice." However, tonight was a little different. "Duke, can I please have a menu this evening? I think I'm in the mood for something new." I was surprised, but I obliged and went to grab her a menu.

As she thumbed through the pages, she jokingly said, "I've had a rough day, and I could really use some dick, I mean meat, I mean sausage.....dick." I scared the patrons at table 12 when I sharply yelled, "WHAT!?!?" While looking directly into my eyes, she adjusted her cleavage and confessed, "Duke, I only eat here so that you'll notice me. I'm tired of eating this mediocre ass food. Daddy, I want your dick for dinner tonight. If you need me to, I'll cover the tip money you'd make if you stayed the rest of your shift. I'm horny, I'm wet, and the seats in my Explorer fold down. Shit, just take a lunch break, and give me what I need."

So.....51min later, I was back from lunch, and Domonique was satisfied. I know that I just got paid to have sex in the IHOP parking lot, but the customer's always right, right? While rummaging through my pockets for my phone, I placed my notepad on the counter. Somehow, Domonique managed to leave me a message....

"Duke, when I come back on Saturday, I would like a Garden Omelet with pancakes, a glass of water, no ice, and a side of dick. Pack the food to go, and just bring it and that dick to the truck. -Nique"